My advice is, as others have said, have no expectations, expect that you will spend the majority of holidays, birthdays, family gatherings, valentines day, anniversaries alone or with other family or friends. In fact, the church is designed to help people come unto Christ, who is the only one who can change our hearts and help us overcome ourselves to come back to him. I felt her fear, everything she's said, I said. It's been really, really hard for my fiancee, and I don't think he would be my fiancee if I was this busy when we had met. Dress nicely, as the girl will appreciate the effort put into looking good for her, and encourage her to do the same. The Mormon culture has mastered the forked tongue.
I'm pretty disturbed by the level of dismissiveness seen in many of the comments here. The system has broken him down and rebuilt him as someone, I fear, I won't be able to respect or feel connected to. He's a devoted father and every ounce of free time goes to his kids. To embrace each others needs and interests, it seems I am destined to long for this connection into eternity. As more and more people marry out of their faith, the subject of interfaith marriage will become more and more important. But is it the path that will make you the happiest.
RB Ruth Barb May I'm an active Mormon girl. We often wonder how we will pay our bills sometimes. While we have a good marriage but he has no idea how lonely I am for my him. I could imagine all these nurses throw theirselves at him regardless he being in a relationship with me. We try to have a 'date' night although at the moment it is about once a month. Should I jump ship. All I can think about is the fact that his schedule means that I will have to be the one to shoulder all the parenting and household responsibilities. And how little some men understand the value of a well-dusted baseboard. With that same attitude they will rise up on the other side of the veil. It sounds like you HAVE done your best in the past.
But I got tired of that, and I made it clear to him that I will stay in with him as often as he wants, put him to bed, make food with him or for him, clean, etc. My dad was in the bishopric for most of my childhood, and I was never the person you describe here. Of course it is impossible Anyways, I am sorry to go on and on. I believe strongly that I was meant to marry my spouse. Additionally, you need to take stock of your beliefs and acknowledge they may change overtime. I would advise you to try to be as understanding as you can of her point of view, because having you world view shattered is very difficult and can take a long time to recover from. There is NO guarantee that marrying a returned missionary RM in the temple equates with love and happiness. But I don't know that he does the same for me. You will only have a happy relationship if either you both believe in the Mormon Church, or both do not believe. He is on call ALL the time, he arrives home 9 pm and barely sit down for diner and then gets called away, then again 2 am heart attack.
